


VENOM

by satelliesziam



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Anal Sex, Blood, Explicit Language, F/M, Forced Orgasm, Handcuffs, Levi is creepy as fuck, M/M, Mental Instability, Plot Twists, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Rape/Non-con Elements, Riding, Shadis is fucktard, Stalking, Suicide, blowjob
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-09 00:39:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11093283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satelliesziam/pseuds/satelliesziam
Summary: Eren Jeager is a twenty-five year old journalist at Survey Corps Publicity.Levi Rivaille is a new transferred patient at Survey Mental Institution.( Or the one where the world is cruel and Eren is forced to find out how much when he stands in one room, eye to eye with the most fucked up person in the world. )





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfiction was in my mind for a long ass time.  
> This fanfiction in no way will be rainbows and unicorns. This takes place in the dark part of my imagination, so you are warned (the tags above?) that shit's not as good at all. In this fic the rape will be a lot, the blood will be a lot.
> 
> Levi is a fucked up person.  
> Eren is his victim.
> 
> Enjoy.

cover of the fanfic made by me:[ **( _x)_**](http://imgur.com/hsy93ik)

* * *

_**Silver and piercing like a bullet eyes.** _

  
It was strange, because I have never had the same dream over and over again. This was more than overwhelming and I was completely lost because my mind was like a broken recorder. When I first started having this dream, I was afraid to speak with anyone. I was tired, too distanced from others at work and I barely spoke. My mind was elsewhere and that didn't go unnoticed, of course. Armin, one of my closest friends tried to find out what was wrong with me but I shut him down. Mikasa was the second person who took interest in my behavior lately and then was the time when I told her. Just tried to experiment and see if she would understand. She did, but hey- there was nothing that could be done about it.   
   
The strange thing was that there was no way in hell I could recognize the owner of those eyes that made my heart beat faster than ever. In my dream, I was surrounded by darkness. A shadow (person?) was standing far away from me. I could see nothing but the eyes which seemed to be close because I could see them perfectly. Those eyes who were cold, like the winter made my body shiver in the most awkward way. They were a shade of silver that only the sky of a really furious storm in the sky had.

I felt so numb all of a sudden. Did his eyes have influence over me? I would not know. It was like a train wreck deep inside of me, hurting, aching. And just when that shadow figure was approaching me, was the time when my eyes snapped open and I sat up panting heavily. I could feel the slight sheen of sweat covering my face. The little salty drops rolled down my forehead and neck, disappearing into the hem of the grey shirt I was wearing. The thin material was darker, soaked around my neck and even I could feel it sticking to my back.  
  
I could feel my breathing calming down. I didn’t have the energy to move for a few more minutes, because my limbs were aching. My eyes quickly scanned the bright room, as if I was waiting for someone to jump on me and strangle me. I was in such paranoia. The things I felt during the dream were like a nightmare for me and I felt my whole being becoming sick just from the picture in my mind.  
  
Suddenly, something in the distance was slowly making me come back to reality _. A well-known sound I could recognize._  First it was a really distant noise, and then slowly became normal and my head snapped to the side. I saw my phone vibrating and lighting up for a few minutes, then shutting back down.  
  
I slowly reached for the mobile device and saw the ID. My eyes widened not only because it was nine pm sharp, but because Shadis was calling me and at the top of my phone I had notifications that he had rang me more than fifteen times. _Well, shit._  
  
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes shut, getting prepared completely to get yelled at by him. His low and husky voice was already echoing in my mind and his insults were repeating themselves like a non-ending circle.  
  
“ Boss, “ I began once the phone was glued to my left year.  
  
“  Jaeger!” he yelled. I could hear male and female voice arguing from the other side of the line and someone shushing them to stop. I could guess that these people were my colleagues and they were definitely gossiping about my ass being kicked out from work. I pinched the bridge of my nose while I kicked away the duvet covering my body and once my feet touched the ground, a strange shiver ran up and down my body.  
  
“ Didn’t I specifically told you to come early today? I am seconds away from firing your pathetic ass. “ he murmured. I licked my lips and stood up. My legs were still weak, wobbling and I had to lean on the nightstand for a few seconds to keep my composure up.  
  
“ I will be there in twenty. “ I replied.  
  
“ Fifteen. If you are not there after fifteen fucking minutes consider yourself fired, Jaeger. This is your last chance. “  
  
I hang up the phone.  
  
My head was hurting really badly as if I had a fucking hangover. And I haven't drank anything at all. Last night I came home, didn't bother to eat. I tried to work some but my mind was in that fucking dream so I just dropped it and went straight to sleep not bothering to take a shower even.  
  
Speaking of shower, I decided to take a really cold one, because my body was burning really badly. It was like I had a fever. Once I walked inside the small bathroom, I started removing the sweaty and gross clothes from my body. Stepping under the cold spray of water, I sighed in relief because my skin was cooled down and it felt so damn good. I planted my palms on the cold tiled walls, bowing my head down, enough to give the drops of water to soothe the tension in my neck and shoulder blades.   _The shower relaxed me, but for a short amount of time._  
  
Once I was out, I searched around my wardrobe in order to find something comfortable to wear. I was not in a mood for dark skinny jeans nor a shirt that was glued to my chest like a second skin. A pair of sweats and lose long shirt should to the job.  
  
On my way out I took a few seconds to look at myself in the mirror.

I looked like a fucking zombie. My skin was pale, my eyes were bright, almost cold. The bags under my eyes told everything. They told how the lack of sleep was affecting me. The dream I have been having for a few weeks now was bugging me even more than it did before. I was a complete wreck. But fuck this- job was more important and I had no fucking time for myself right now. 

Another day with too much tension and work ahead of me. _Oh, goodie._  
  
Once I was in my car, I tried to mentally prepare myself because Shadis would have my ass on steak now. I was never late for work, this was only the second time in the four years I have been working at Survey Corps Publicity. A newspaper that was accurate and told the information exactly like it was.  I was glad I managed to work there, the payment was not so much but at least I did what I loved. I was working at the Journalist department. It was really exciting and I would not give up on this job for anything else.  
  
“ You are one minute late, Jaeger. “ Shadis growled at me once I walked into the conferencing room where all of my colleagues were gathered. The papers were scattered around the huge long wooden table and everyone’s gazes were on me.  
  
“ What happened to you, Eren. “ Mikasa’s concerned face popped in front of me. She placed her hands on my shoulder and her eyes examined me for a few minutes.  
  
“ You will chit-chat later, Ackerman! “ he said and leaned back on his chair.  “ I am pissed at Jaeger for getting late today, so try not to be on my list too. Sit your ass down now. “ he gritted through his teeth. That fucking jackass, thinking he could boss us around like he owned the world.  
  
Me and Mikasa sat down. I pulled out some documents from my backpack and left them on the table. Across from me, Jean was looking at me like I murdered someone. He was dying to have my position and he’d do anything for me to screw up and fall down.  
  
I looked up at him and gave him a snort, which he returned with roll of his eyes. Armin nudged me with his elbow and then everyone looked at Shadis who was pacing back and forth in the small room, his black eyes focused on the ground, lips pursed and jaw slack. This guy had no chill, I tell ya.  
  
“ We have to put something on the front page of the newspaper. “ My boss murmured under his breath and lifted his head to search for everyone’s ideas. Armin slid down on his chair, I could tell he had no clue what to say. He was good in editing, not collecting information.  
  
A girl sitting across me next to jean was eating quietly some energy bar, her brown eyes were wide . I could say she was a newbie with us, because I knew almost everyone here.  
  
_Jean, the fucktard of a horse-face who was an evil person._  
  
_There was Mikasa, my neighbor and closest friend._  
  
Armin with his genius ideas of editing and incredible friendship.  
  
_And then there was Marco. A quiet guy who was helping with whatever he could. I could see that his shyness was just a mask, once you get to know him; he was a very decent and funny guy._  
  
“ Mrs.Blouse! “ Shadis yelled and slammed his fist on the table. We all jumped. “ Do you have an idea what to put on the upcoming up newspaper?! “  
  
The girl stopped chewing and swallowed heavily, looking down at her lap. I leaned toward Armin. “ Poor girl. “  
  
The blonde pursed his lips together in attempt not to laugh. “ She will get used to it, eventually. We all did. “  
  
Fair point.  
  
“ What about the woman who got stabbed yesterday in front of her house? “ Mikasa called and Shadis immediately looked at her, his eyes darkening. Shit, did he got pissed off because she interrupted his bitchiness?  
  
I looked at her, she was totally unfazed. Maybe that was one of the reasons Shadis hasn’t fired her at all. She could keep up with tension and didn’t paid attention to his shitty attitude.  
  
“ We did that last week. Be more creative for God’s sake. “  
  
“ The cat that was rescued from a tree? “ asked hesitantly Armin. Sasha bursted out laughing while Jean and Marco were shaking their heads.  
  
“ You fucked up, Armin. “ Jean snickered. I narrowed my eyes at horse face and he shut up immediately.  
  
“ Our readers are not five year old children who still piss their pants. “ Shadis replied. When nobody in the room made attempt to laugh, he rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, pinching his nose. His humor was as shitty as his attitude.    
  
“ What about an exclusive interview of the new transferred patient at Survey Mental Institution? “  
  
We all turned to look at Marco’s suggestion. I had no clue that a new patient has been transferred there and I usually was really observing about the news in this city. I had to, this was kind of my job. Lately I have been feeling like shit and missing the important things.  
  
Shadis raised an eyebrow as I heard Arming gasping beside me.

Marco scoffed and opened the bright blue folder in front of him as he gave each one of us the record he had been able to ‘snitch’ from the police about the new transfer. There was no picture, _of course._  
  
“ Dude, no- “ started Jean after he read some of the file. “ – that guy is dangerous as fuck “

 _ **Rivaille**_ **, Levi** I managed to read.  
  
Mikasa rolled her eyes and sighed. “ I will go and do it… you guys are just a bunch of pussies and you call yourself men. “ she scoffed and Sasha laughed softly.  
  
“ Excuse you. “ Jean said and pouted.

“ Eren will go. “ Shadis spoke.

“ What? “ Mikasa and Marco yelled in unison. I looked at Mikasa and then at Marco completely confused by this situation.

“ End of story. “ he collected his documents from the table and minutes later he was out from the office, leaving us all with our mouths hanging open.   
  
_Why me?_ This was the first thought of mine. _Why was I the one screwed up after everything?_

I was in no mood to listen to their ramblings. I looked back at the piece of paper in my hands as my eyes scanned the small letters. For a moment they were blurry and they didn’t make any sense even but after I blinked once everything was back to normal.  
  
What the hell…  
  
I gulped as I felt my hands shaking. My friends’s voices echoed through my mind like a distant sound.  
  
I tried to ignore everything in my body and focus on the file in my hand.  
  
**Rape.**  
  
_This guy was accused in raping a young boy and then slitting his throat in the most brutal way possible._  
  
Oh, god- what did my fucking retarded boss got me into?!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3k of words, people.  
> Things are about to get twisted.
> 
> Stay tuned. xox  
> ( Not beta'd chapter. Apologize for any mistakes. )

“ Eren, man! C’mon. Have a drink, stop overthinking so much! “ Marco told me in a cheerful voice as he turned his attention to the person behind the bar and tapped two times the wooden surface of to catch his attention and order alcohol. It was kind of tradition for us to gather every Thursday evening at the oh-so well familiar bar. Everyone knew us, and we knew everyone there.  
  
Connie, the bartender nodded without hesitation and pulled the glasses and the large bottle with Jack Daniels whiskey from the cabinets. I could feel his eyes on me and I couldn’t help it but bow my head down in embarrassment. He clearly knew that I was not being myself lately. Everyone knew it, I knew it but what was I supposed to do? I had too much things on my head.  
  
Once the glass was served to me, I lifted it in the air and murmured a quiet ‘cheers’ before bringing the alcohol to my lips. The taste of the liquid was bitter and not pleasant at all. Usually, us being together in a bar after work was my favorite thing. I had the chance to relax, laugh and talk about my boss who was a total ass. Marco or Jean would come up with a small story about how Shadis has been trying to clean his boots at work and the way he was talking about them as if they were his children. We’d laugh so hard that people would stare at us for minutes.

But tonight…I could hear my friends talking about me as if I was not there. I was quickly dozing off into the depths into my mind. Shadis made me and Mikasa go at the asylum. He was gritting his teeth at me because he was definitely on the edge because of me. Why? Because I was a total wreck these days and if I fucked up, he’d fire my ass in a heartbeat.  Mikasa was going to take pictures of the building and the patient while I was sitting on the table and asking the questions.

I was terrified and disgusted at the same time. I mean….a child rape? And then a murder? Whoever the victim was did not deserve to be treated like that at all. That guy Levi had the guts and the cold heart to just do such thing. Just by the mere thought of it I could feel goose bumps rise all over my body.

“ Eren, “ I heard Armin’s concerned voice echo in my mind. I quickly lifted my eyes and everyone was staring at me. I could see Marco’s shocked expression; Armin's wide eyes and Mikasa’s dark gaze. I frowned. What was happening?  Suddenly it all came to me. **The reality.** **The tiredness** _. Where I was._ The stinging and aching pain in my hand. I looked down and I saw _blood._

 I gasped as I quickly sat up, the stool made a loud screeching sound on the floor and the people sitting around us were looking at me as well. I let out a soft groan because the little pieces of glasses were digging into the skin of my palm while some of the liquid was spilled on the floor and the rest of it was on my jeans. _Fuck.  
_  
_I had squeezed the glass so hard that it broke. What the hell is wrong with me?_  
  
“ Connie, you have the first aid kit? “ I heard Marco ask and Connie sprinted to the back of the bar without saying anything. The music on the background was in a low volume and I could hear the whispers surrounding me.  
_  
“ He is crazy. “  
  
“ That guy just squeezed the glass with his hand and broke it. How retarted you must be do to that. “  
  
“ Let’s go, I don’t wanna be near this guy. “_  
  
Mikasa slowly took my hand and made me open my palm a little. I hissed in pain and she made a soft ‘tch’ sound before wrapping her slim fingers around my wrist as she pulled my hand closer to her so she could inspect it. “ Has this happened before? “ she asked and I shook my head in response.  
  
“ No-“  
  
I heard Armin taking the small suitcase with first aid kit inside as he tapped Mikasa on the shoulder. She looked at him and sighed slowly before letting Armin take over my wound.  
  
“ I think you should go home, Eren. You are not okay. I can talk to Shadis and take over the interview. “ he murmured a few minutes later. Marco was still watching me quietly from distance. He was confused, I could tell. Nobody has ever seen me this distracted and out of my own mind before.  
  
“ I am fine “  
  
“ No you are not. You doze off easily, you have dark circles under your eyes, your skin is pale…You should go and see a doctor, Jaeger. You look like a fucking zombie. “ I heard Jean say. When this dude had come? I snorted at him and shook my head, trying to ignore the burning pain in my hand.  
  
“ Come on, love. I’ll drive ya home. “ Armin said once he had bandaged my hand. He gripped my elbow in attempt to help me walk. I was confused at first but then I felt my wobbly legs and if it wasn’t for the blonde, I’d have found the floor really quick. I didn’t protest. I wanted to rest. I wanted to lose myself in dreamland.  Tomorrow everything would be okay.  I’d be okay. _It’d be forgotten._

  _It was not forgotten._  
  
Not at all.  
  
The same dream haunted me. Mocked me for being so damn weak. I woke up all sweaty and panting again. I clutched the duvet covering my body and yelled in frustration, throwing the damn duvet off me. The clock said 3am.  
  
I paced pack and forth, my hands tugging my sweaty hair. The pain of my nails digging into my scalp lessened the aching I had in my chest but for a little while. I needed another shower.  
  
Today at work we’d carefully examine the documents about this guy. Some of the workers had to prepare everything. From the access to the patient, to taking pictures there with permission. Being a damn journalist had its perks and bull rap at the same time.  
  
I wasn’t late for work however.  Right after the cold shower I took, I couldn’t sleep anymore. My heart was still beating rapidly in my chest and I found myself clutching the small decorative pillow of the couch while watching _Deadpool._

 Shadis eyed me up and down but didn’t say anything.  Either he was in a very good mood to yell at me or he was too busy to do so. Armin and Mikasa were with me in my rather small office. I was sat at my chair while they were sitting on the couch. A huge pile of papers scattered on the floor.  
  
The strange thing was that there was nothing from this guy’s past. No parents or close people. It was strange. It was like he appeared in thin air and brutally murdered the boy.    
  
And the shock? The young victim was not the only victim. An elder woman and two older men were killed brutally by him as well. In one of the files I read that Levi had to do a psycho test. It turned out positive and then the court had decided to put him in mental hospital. However, he was not from the calm patients. He never slept - **insomnia**. He had constant hallucinations, a few times he tried to slit his wrists but guards managed to prevent him from doing so.

That guy was a horrible person.

 Okay, Eren. Calm down.

It is just one interview. Everything will be okay.

 _Deep breaths._  
  
Shadis bursted in the office just when Mikasa was showing me some reports from the autopsy of the victims.    
  
“ Jaeger, the interview will be on the sixth of January which means you have two days to prepare your ass. Everything is settled. The doctors will wait for you and Mikasa. Don’t screw up, yeah? “He used that cocky and snarky tone at me again. What did I do to deserve this? He was definitely in a mood to yell at me now. Great. Just what I wanted.  
  
I saw Armin raising his eyebrow and once my boss was out of the office without letting anyone respond to him, the blonde nudged me with his shoulder.  
  
“ It’ll be fine, Eren. “  
  
“ Yeah, I am with you. “ Mikasa replied. She ruffled my hair “ I am going to get us something for a drink. “ she said and walked out from the office in a rush. What was she rushing for? It’s not like I was thirsty. Weird.

*******

**[(x)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TdiNs2bE9A) ** It was a fucking nightmare.  
  
I have never imagined going to a place that was forsaken by God. I could feel the cold razors of the air cutting through my skin brutally. I clutched tightly my notebook as I was climbing out from the car.

 [ _What I would do to take away_ _t_ _his fear of being loved_ _…_ _Allegiance to the pain_ _, n_ _ow I fucked up and I miss you_ _…_ _I'll never be like you.. ]_

 Mikasa turned toward me, giving me a slight smile. It was not the fucking time to smile! Not at all. I was scared shitless by that huge place. From the outside the asylum looked just like a abondoned cemetery for people. The paint which was once in a dark blue shade was now gone. The walls cracked and the windows were covered by different papers, because some of the windows missed glasses or had huge holes in them. The heavy gates at the front made a loud screeching sound and I had to bite my lower lip to stop from running back to the car and locking myself inside.

  _[ I would give anything to change_ _t_ _his fickle-minded heart_ _, t_ _hat loves fake shiny things_ _… ]_

The two metal doors we were standing in front of opened minutes later and a tall blonde man wearing white uniform greeted us. He said his name was Dr. Erwin Smith. He was Levi’s doctor and he was familiar with his condition.  
  
“ Pleasure meeting you Mrs.Ackerman and Mr. Jaeger. “ his white straight teeth showed and I had to stare elsewhere because I could feel his blue eyes on me. I shifted from one foot to another and clutched tightly my notebook and pen to my chest.  
  
“ In which room is the patient? “ Mikasa asked after she greeted him politely as well.

 “ Very well, “ he murmured and crossed his hands behind his back. “ Follow me. “

 _[ Now I fucked up and I miss you_ _…_ _I'll never be like you ]_

Dr.Smith slowly led us to the second floor and down one huge long corridor. The lamps flicked and it the smell was disgusting. There were creepy as fuck pictures on the walls and I was able to hear strange sounds like whispers and someone scratching on the walls.

“ You hear that? “ I asked nervously Mikasa as she was walking with me.  
  
She looked at me with confused expression on her face. “ Hear what? “  
  
“ Come on, I can’t be the only one hearing these sounds. Focus, Mikasa… “ I whisper-yelled since the tall doctor was right in front of us . Mikasa frowned as she listened but her face said it all.  
  
Her face said that I was going crazy.  
  
_Fucking hell._  
  
“ Alright, let me get a few things straight. “ The doctor said as we stopped in front of a black metal door with two-sided bars. Whoa. Did they keep Hulk in there?  
  
“ You will have only fifteen minutes to ask him the questions. He has handcuffs on, so I doubt he’ll try something. If he starts saying things that do not make sense, just get out. I will put two guards in front of the doors.  “ Erwin reassured us, smiling politely.  
  
“ Ready, Eren? “ Mikasa leaned into me as she asked me, her voice laced with concern.  
  
“ Let’s do this. “

 _[ I'm only human, can't you see?I made, I made a mistake_ _…_ _Please just look me in my face_ _, t_ _ell me everything's okay_ _'_ _c_ _ause I got it_ _…_ _Ooh, never be like you... ]_ _  
  
_ Erwin opened slowly the doors. The room was in dimmed lighting.  The walls were cracked, scratched with black and red paint. There was only one table in the middle of the room, so I guessed this was the room where the cry-cry patients were visited from their beloved ones.  
  
On the other side of the table was sitting someone. I tried to muster the face but it was useless. The lights were not letting me from doing so.  
  
“ Can you turn on the lights? “ I turned to the doctor and he immediately flicked the light from the outside of the door. Everything was clear now. I heard someone’s gasp and I could tell it was Mikasa’s.  
  
When I turned to look at the person sitting on the table, I took in a sharp breath. I could tell that the male was muscular. His hair was covering his face since his head was bowed down. I could see his pale skin despite that, maybe the light made it even paler? He was dressed in blue ripped pants and white shirt. His hands were handcuffed and he had laced his fingers together, as if he was just casually waiting at the bus stop for someone to come and pick him up.  
  
I jumped once I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder. “ If there is a problem, just knock on the door. The guards will deal with everything. “ I heard the doctor whisper and minutes later the door was slammed shut with me and Mikasa inside.  
  
_Okay._  
  
You can do this, Eren.  
  
I looked at Mikasa. She slowly pulled out her camera and found herself a small space at one of the corners in the small room. I was scared but the fact that Mikasa was here with me lessened the fear in me.  
  
“ It won’t take long. I am here for a short period time, so I hope you will cooperate with me and get this over with. “ I said in a voice I could not recognize as my own since it was too shaky and raspy. Once I was comfortable on the chair right in front of man, I slowly opened my notebook and squeezed my pencil tightly in my hand.  
  
The male hadn’t lifted his head at all. It looked like he was in deep thoughts. I caught glimpse of the stains of blood on his white shirt and the mere thought that someone’s blood was on him made me cringe.  
  
A few minutes into the awkward silence, Levi slowly lifted his head. His lips twitched slightly and his face never changed from the emotionless mask he was wearing.  
  
Once I saw his eyes, it was like the air was knocked out from my lungs. Those eyes.

  **Silver. Bullet.**

 [  _I'm only human, can't you see?I made, I made a mistake_ _…_ _Please just look me in my face_ _, t_ _ell me everything's okay_ _'_ _c_ _ause I got it_ _…_ _Ooh, never be like you ]_  
  
“ Why, I didn’t knew you’d be the one asking the questions. “ His voice was low and husky. It was far different from what I expected. I was slightly startled but immediately straightened my composure and pursed my lips together.  
  
“ What made you rape and kill the boy? “ why was he talking like he knew me?  
  
“ I wanted it. “  
  
I gulped and the guy noticed. He leaned a little bit forward and stared into my face. I stared at his as well. Those silver eyes were piercing my soul. It was like I was in the dream once again. Something was not right.

“ This is not an answer. “  
  
“ Your question is not a question. If you ask it right, I might answer. “  
  
Levi was fumbling with his fingers. I could see the various scars on his hands, from his palms to his wrists and elbows. He was covered in dirt as well which made me think of the conditions this institution had. His black hair was half-wet. The strands clanged to his forehead like a glue;    
  
**Red.**  
  
Suddenly I saw red. I could see myself standing in front of Levi, my hands and clothes were covered in blood.  I started yelling, my throat was dry and hurting. I could feel the steam of tears running down my cheeks.  
  
“ Eren, “ Levi whispered in my ear as he slowly pressed his hand on my chest and I felt the excruciating and burning pain deep within me. I could see his expression.  His eyes were glowing and his plump lips were stretched in a wicked smile. Once I looked down, I saw a large pool of blood beneath me. My eyes caught a glimpse of Levi holding something in his bloody hand. Once he squeezed it I immediately stopped breathing. My vision suddenly became red.    
  
**A heart.**  
  
Levi was holding a heart in his hand.  
  
_My heart._  
  
“ Eren, “ Mikasa whispered and I quickly jumped in my seat. Was this…a hallucination? I quickly turned to look at her;  
  
“  Are you okay? “ She asked. “ We should call the Doctor and stop with the interview. “  
  
I tried to calm my breathing. It was like my lungs were burning.  
  
“ I am fine- I promise. “ I cleaned my throat and turned my head back to Levi who was leaning back on his chair, his eyes never shifting off me.  
  
“ Siblings? “ I muttered out after a few seconds of silence.  
  
“ No. “  
  
“ Friends? “  
  
“ No. “  
  
I sighed. The questions were not much because I couldn’t find the time and focus to write more. Some of them were even not finished til the end. God, Shadis will murder me.    
  
“ Did you enjoyed watching your victims choke on their blood? “ I asked suddenly. Levi just tilted his head to one side and lifted his hands slowly to fix the strands of his hair.  
  
“ Very much. The blood was warm, warming my body… I could hear their last breath….Their pleads….everything. “  
  
Noted.  
  
I wrote it in my notebook and licked my dry lips. Focus, you need to focus, Eren.  
  
“ Tell me, Eren. Did you enjoyed it?“  
  
My eyes immediately widened.  
  
What was he talking about?  Did I enjoyed what?!  
  
“ How do you know my name? “  
  
“ _I know everything._ “ he smirked and I could feel my stomach flipping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the lyrics of the song in this chapter is Levi and Eren's theme song :333


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ookay, next chapter will be da bomb.
> 
> Everything starts from there; Stay tuned. x 
> 
> I need a beta for editing the chapters. Volunteers?

“Fifteen minutes are up. “One of guards opened the small window of the door and gazed at Mikasa and me. His dark gaze was mainly focused on the male in front of me. I guess everyone were afraid from Levi who just sat there, completely calm.  If a person looked at him without knowing what he had done, he’d think that it was just an innocent man held against his will but it was far scarier than that.  
  
Levi was oozing with scary vibes. His steel cold eyes were piercing straight through my chest and into my heart. I felt my lungs burning. He had this mysterious smile on his face that didn’t tell me anything else beside that he knew who I was.   
  
I could feel my hands and knees shaking. Cold sweat was running down my forehead and cheeks. Levi kept staring at me as he was slowly rolling a metal nail around his pointer finger. Something like a snake wrapped around his skin. I couldn’t say anything since my tongue was tied up and I couldn’t trust my voice.  
  
I heard Mikasa’s cursing at the guard who had come inside and was holding her by the elbow in a tight grip and forcefully wanted to get us out from the room.   
  
“ No matter what you do, Eren… you will come back to me…” he was so sure that this was going to happen, I could see the determination in his eyes. “ …or I will come to you. “ Levi straightened his chin a little, his messy hair fell on top of his eyes. His look was empty now. So empty and cold that I was minutes away from collapsing at how intense this situation was.   
  
I closed loudly my notebook and quickly found myself pushing the guard off Mikasa.   
  
“ Don’t touch her. “ I hissed at the taller than me man and then walked out from the room, not bothering to look behind at all. I could hear Mikasa’s fast footsteps behind me. Once we were at the main hallway of the asylum, I felt slim fingers digging into my shoulder and I found myself face to face with Mikasa.  
  
“ What happened back there? “ she whisper yelled, her face was filled with shock and panic and it was so rare to see her like this.  “ How does this psycho know you? “ she asked.

“ How should I fucking know? I don’t know him. “ I answered  sharply. I didn’t need another lecture right now. I have had enough and all I wanted was to go back home and drink myself to sleep. Yeah, that was a good idea.  
  
On our way out we met Dr.Erwin speaking with a tall girl. Her hazelnut brown hair was pulled up in a ponytail, a few strands of her hair was slowly falling on her face. She had huge glasses on and by the looks of it, she was a doctor here too.   
  
The blonde tall doctor turned to look at us with a huge frown. Oh great.    
  
“ I saw what happened in the room, but I am not sure how to explain it.  “his voice echoed through the quiet hall minutes later. The woman in glasses was gazing me up and down as if I was a piece of meat. What was happening?  


“ There is nothing to be explained. This guy must have confused me with someone! “ I snapped at him and I felt bad for it minutes later, because I was scared too okay? I should lock my doors from now on in fear of this guy finding where  I was. “I meet him for the first time of my damn life. “   
  
Smith’s expression softened. He cleared his throat and nodded his head, scratching the back of his neck. “ I apologize. However, I need you to come back here again. I want to have a word with you. “I frowned. What was he all about?   
  
I could see his blue eyes shifting at Mikasa who just huffed in annoyance. “ Alone. “ he added.   
  
“ I don’t want to come back here again. “ This building was slowly draining all of my energy. I could feel it. My head was aching and I barely kept my eyes open;  
  
“ You have to. “  
  
The woman in glasses sighed. “ I got to run a few tests on you. “ What?  
  
“ What tests? “  
  
“ Uh, it’s not that important, really. I just want to see your condition. “  
  
“ Hanji, it’s not the time to talk about this right now. “ Erwin scolded. “ I will see you tomorrow, Eren. “ he replied. Hanji looked at Mikasa who was standing right beside me dumb folded.   
  
Once the two doctors were away from us I started walking faster and faster to the exit.   
  
“ Eren, I don’t know what is happening exactly, but I am here for you. “  
  
“ I know. “  
  
We both climbed inside of the car and once I saw the huge creepy building slowly fading away from my sight, I was able to breathe again.

 

  
  
***  
  
  


Was I a psychic or something? I never met this guy, nor I know what I did to deserve this. I kept seeing his eyes in my dreams, but this time it was clearer. I could see his face completely. His lean and muscular figure in the dark was making my heart beat faster than before. His hands were covered in blood and his face had that scary grimace I tried to run from many times and just when I was about to get caught by him, my eyes snapped open and I sat up again. This time I didn’t felt the hot waves run down my body. I felt goose bumps rise all over and something cold enveloping me.

I grew fond of the cold showers I took each time I’d wake up from another nightmare. I had used to the cold little water drops falling over my neck and running slowly down my shoulder blades. It managed to calm me but for a short amount of time.   
  
It was only six am when I walked out from the shower, drying my wet hair with a towel. I looked at myself in the huge mirror in front of the bed and examined myself. I looked worse than before.  
  
Levi’s words couldn’t get out from my mind. They repeated constantly and that drove me insane. I had so many questions. Maybe I had to go back there and find out what was he talking about…   
  
Dr.Erwin was acting strange as well. He was concerned somehow, maybe because I was upset with the things Levi said? His words didn’t made any fucking sense at all. Despite that, I was still in shock.   
  
“ Armin, can you cover me for a few hours today? I have some stuff that I need to do before coming to work. “ I said while pacing back and forth in my room, searching for my clothes.  
  
I heard a loud rustling sound from the other side of the line and a loud thump. “ You okay? “ I asked him concerned, frowning.  
  
“ Yeah. Just a little sleepy. I will do it, Eren. Don’t worry. “ he muttered in a low voice, almost a whisper.  
  
“ Armin, is there someone in the room with you? “  I stopped with searching for my clothes and frowned.  
  
“ Uh- n-o. It’s just me. “ I did not believed him.   
  
“ Armin…you can tell me anything, right? “  
  
Armin let out a soft yawn and then I heard a distant voice but it was not unfamiliar one.   
  
“ Who is calling you so fucking early? “  
  
The way the words were pronounced, the deep husky voice and the slight tremble in it. This was definitely Jean. Jean Kirstein.  
  
My eyes widened.  
  
“ Holy-“ I started but Armin cut me off.  
  
“ Okay, I will tell Shadis not to hunt you down, okay? I gotta go, take care!  “ He hang up on me right after. I let out a soft laugh and shook my head.    
  
I was grateful to have a friend like Armin. We both met in uni and while he had the chance to finish his major, I had to quit and start working because I didn’t had enough money to pay for the semesters.   
  
Despite that, thanks to Armin I started working to Publicity News. Of course, Shadis was quite skeptical about me at first, but as the months went by, he saw that I could manage with the tempo and high tension at the work so he let me work there, but for that – he acted like an asshole toward me on a daily basis.   
  
Once  I was dressed in the clothes I had picked out from my wardrobe and my hair was dried I quickly took my keys and wallet as I locked securely the door of my flat and walked to my car. I could feel my body shaking; I was so fucking nervous.  I had no desire to return back, maybe I should just call the doctors and let them know that I will not go?  
  
But Erwin seemed serious about that. And what does this has to do with my condition? I knew I was not fine, maybe emotionally unstable because of Shadis’s abuse and tension at work, but this was not something that has not happened before. I was always a stressed out kid at school and I never paid attention to these things.   
  
Thank God for the music on the radio that distracted me just for a mere amount of time. The drive to the Mental Institution was not long like it was yesterday. Once I parked my car in front of the familiar gates of the big building, I had to stay in the car for a few minutes and take deep breaths. God, I needed a cigarette.  
  
I pulled out my box of Malboro from my backpack and rolled it between my fingers, still contemplating on wether should I smoke now or not. Fuck it.  
  
Yes, smoking is really damn unhealthy but every person has his addictions and habits. I guess mine was smoking. I haven’t smoked in a while, but today I felt the urge to feel the smoke in my lungs and just exhale it while I close my eyes. I needed to calm down.   
  
It took me more than five minutes to finish my cigarette. Once I climbed out from the car, I slammed shut the door and threw the cancer stick on the ground.  
  
Okay.   
  
This was it.  
  
God, I needed answers asap.  
  
I walked toward the gates and they opened. I looked around because I could definitely feel someone watching me. I was sure of it, but the strange thing here was that nobody was around.   
  
“ Mr. Jaeger! “ I heard a familiar voice. I quickly looked up to be greeted with the tall and lean figure of Dr.Smith.   
  
“ Hello. “  
  
“ I am really glad you came. Please, follow me. “  
  
I raised an eyebrow at him once we handshook our hands and I couldn’t do anything but follow him. We took on a total different rote. Instead of the second floor down to the creepy hallway, he led me down the first floor where a lot of nurses were pushing wheelchairs with elder people sitting on them. Some of them were laughing, others staring blankly at the walls or whispering creepy things.   
  
I felt shivers run up and down my body.  
  
I stopped once I saw that Erwin opened a white wooden door and walked inside. I followed suit and noticed that this place was quite nice. It was his office because there were some cabinets with different medications, a huge desk in front of the huge mirror and two chairs. It had some pictures on the blue painted walls.  
  
“ Please, sit. “  
  
I took a sit on one of the chairs and the doctor sat opposite me.   
  
“ Why am I here? “ I asked.  
  
Erwin sighed and cleared his throat. “ We need to run a few tests on you, Mr. Jaeger. I promise, nothing to worry about. “  
  
“ When you tell me not to worry about, this is exactly what I am gonna do. “  
  
Erwin let out a soft laugh and shook his head, leaning back on his chair. He took one of the pens on his desk and began clicking it and rolling it between his fingers. “ Have you had intense hallucinations lately? “  
  
I frowned. He must have seen my condition as I walked into the room.   
  
“ How intense are they? “  
  
“ It feels like I am almost there. “  
  
“ You are having nightmares, right? “  
  
I fumbled with my fingers.  
  
“ I do. “  
  
“ What are your dreams exactly? Does one dream repeat constantly in your mind? “  
  
I bit my lower lip. It was like he understood what was happening with me. “ Yes. “  
  
“ And what do you dream about. “  
  
“ I dream about…. a shadow that is constantly haunting me. I dream about blood and two steel eyes piercing my soul. “ I was so focused on what I was saying that I didn’t noticed Erwin leaning forward and asking me another question.  
  
I suddenly could hear his voice in the distance, it echoed again and I dozed off to another dimension. I looked down at my hands and I could see them covered in blood, but It was not mine. My heart started beating fast and I felt that I would collapse right then and there.  
  
“ Mr.Jeager! “ someone yelled but I was too deep in the dream. Too deep to think about what exactly was happening to me.   
  
There was a sound of siren.   
  
What was happening?  
  
I heard a door creaking loudly and another voice. It was a female voice. Something was happening. I felt my body being lifted and then everything sank into darkness.   
  
  



End file.
